But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
