I smell stomach acid.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
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