Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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