Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
