TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
