oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
So much rum. So many feels.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
