The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
