May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize