I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
