No awkward lesbian experiences without me
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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