Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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