Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
