I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
