I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Randomize
