chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
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