everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
operation have a gay friend backfired
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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