I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
