i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
