wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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