Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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