Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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