Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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