and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
