I wannas sexs uuuuu
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize
