You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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