Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I have tasted many bathrooms
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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