With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Randomize
