I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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