i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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