dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Girls should come with a carfax report
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
