For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
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