How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
