I'm lost and stupid without you.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
