Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize