those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
