So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
