Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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