I wanna passion pit in your ass
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
