I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I want a musical about memes.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize
