you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
how drunk are you?
Several
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
