the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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