Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
