i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize