i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
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No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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