This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Randomize
