and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
