She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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