I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
