Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Randomize
