do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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